A photo of a sad giraffe

Breaking

“Surprised We Made It This Far” Says Endangered Giraffe

4 Apr , 2018  

Giraffes are on the brink of endangerment thanks to decades of hunting and habitat destruction. Now featured on the endangered animals list, giraffes are “absolutely livid”. It’s a sad truth we must all come to terms with; our children may never get to ride a giraffe. “Our necks are embarrassingly long and it’s nothing more […]

, , , , , , , ,

Breaking

Your Cats Hate You, Research Suggests

30 Sep , 2017  

New Research Claims Cats Are Horrible New collaborative research stemming from the Universities of Newcastle and Sheffield conclusively reveal cats just don’t give a fuck. It has been confirmed that cats actually hate their owners and make terrible pets. The study, soon to be published in many scientific journals, also said people who claim to […]

, , , ,

Entertainment

Hamsters Confirmed As Terrible Pets

28 Sep , 2017  

Hamsters Voted As Worst Pet Voting concluded at the Shit Pet Awards today and critics unanimously agreed that Hamsters are the worst pet to own. ‘The fact they literally do nothing’ was cited as the main reason. The award for second place was taken by snakes, as owning one makes you look like a serial […]

, , ,

Breaking

Dogs Have No Idea What Is Going On, Researchers Discover

21 Sep , 2017  

New Research Suggests Dogs Are Really Stupid A conclusive experiment from Sheffield Hallam University has successfully proved that dogs have no idea what is going on. It has been proven that Man’s best friend is actually a complete idiot. The species, despite how intelligent its owners claim it to be, has minimal self-awareness and lives […]

, , , , ,