Entertainment

Man Wrongly Thinks Owning A Snake Is Cool & Edgy

13 Oct , 2017  

There Is No Reason To Own A Snake A man wrongly believed that his pet snake would make him appear cool, when in fact it makes him a social outcast. A recent poll, conducted across people who deserve to have an opinion, has revealed that owning one makes you weird. The reptiles are bizarre pets. […]

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Entertainment, Politics

Donald Trump & Kim Jong-Un Agree to Fight on Pay-Per-View

12 Oct , 2017  

Trump v Kim, No Holds Barred It has today been announced that leader of the free world, Donald J Trump, is to fight the eternal leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-Un on Pay-Per-View. It has not been decided yet what discipline the match will take. Kim put forward the idea of boxing but Trump claimed […]

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Entertainment

‘Balding Men Should Just Give Up’ – Women

2 Oct , 2017  

Hairline Starting to Recede? Start Worrying Now A recent social study has concluded that women who are dating bald men or men that are showing signs of balding are either “waiting for the right moment to break up” or simply looking to “let themselves go without the fear of being alone”. The statistics suggest that […]

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Entertainment

Hamsters Confirmed As Terrible Pets

28 Sep , 2017  

Hamsters Voted As Worst Pet Voting concluded at the Shit Pet Awards today and critics unanimously agreed that Hamsters are the worst pet to own. ‘The fact they literally do nothing’ was cited as the main reason. The award for second place was taken by snakes, as owning one makes you look like a serial […]

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Entertainment

Drinking WKD Doesn’t Make Him Any Less Manly, Man Insists

28 Sep , 2017  

WKD Discrimination & The Fight For Equal Drinking Rights Continues A man has been caught in a local branch of Wetherspoons desperately trying to defend a popular alcopop. James Stringlefellow, from Norwich, bought the bright blue and barely alcoholic drink just after 10pm on Friday. On his way back from the bar, girls began to […]

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Entertainment

Man Too Shy To Poo At Work

28 Sep , 2017  

Being Too Shy To Poo At Work Is Ruining His Career Nervous businessman Barry Tiggles went on record to say how shy he’s been too shy to go for a poo whilst at work. An accountant from Burnely, Tiggles had been regularly driving home to relieve himself as he was too nervous to use the […]

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Entertainment

Anal Sex Improves Life Expectancy, Study Confirms

25 Sep , 2017  

Scientists Are Excited About The Health Benefits of Anal A recent scientific study has been published and claims that receiving anal sex improves life expectancy. Researchers at University College London have discovered that life expectancy for people who often receive anal sex increases by up to three years. Professor Phinga Mhbumole regarding the discovery, said: […]

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Breaking, Entertainment

Defiant Geography Student: ‘Didn’t want a job anyway!’

14 Sep , 2017  

Geography Student Doesn’t Want Employment A defiant geography student has today gone on record to say he “did not actually even want a job” before he started his degree and undertook it for his passion of colouring. Jacoby Slump studied the three-degree at the University of Hull. He said: “Getting a job that pays well […]

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